Am I crazy?

I bought a groupon last year to Studio X where they do fitness classes based on pole dancing. I never used the classes. I was too embarrassed to go by myself. A resolution for 2012 is to go to a set of classes there doing just that. I think it will help me get more in touch with who I am and who I want to be. I hope to get a confidence boost from it, hopefully. My hubby will maybe be a bit shocked to read what I have written here, but I am committed to doing it. There are just some things that I have always wanted to do and have been way too afraid. I do not want to live like that in 2012 so I am going to make some changes and I am starting with that. Their January calendar is not out yet, but once it is, I am signing up for one class. If I do not want to do more after that, I do not have to, but at least I will know. It is like physical therapy. I was so dismissive of it last spring when my doc first brought it up thinking I am a recreational runner. Why should I bother, but I now know it would have helped me then and stopped my problem from getting worse. At least I am getting that fixed now. Physical therapists are miracle workers in my opinion.
So some other things I want to do....I want to wear a string bikini to the beach (on a trip with my husband, no kids.) I want to take a set of portraits for my hubby now that would make me blush in forty or fifty years. I am only young once and I want to remember how well I took care of myself and have visual proof of it. I want to get a micro-derm abrasion because I think it would help the texture of my skin that is....ugh....aging. I think it will help and make me feel better. I want to color my hair...maybe not ready for that this year but before I am 40. I want to spend an entire day in bed with my husband and I do mean an entire day. Maybe it would bore us to tears, but in theory, it sounds like fun and relaxing. I want to do a nice, enticing job at a task that I have promised to do provided my hubby meets one of 2011's New Year's resolution. (And Studio X can certainly help with that.) I want to read a book month and paint our bedroom a hot, sexy color that we can live with on a day to day basis but will not scream that we are a boring couple. I want to laugh more and find more joy in the day to day passing of life. I want to run outside one am with my best friend when it is 27 degrees. (It was 37 yesterday so we are getting close.) I want to run 10 miles all at once. The most I have ever done is 9.13. I prefer to go more specific but all in all, I think that these things can and will make me feel younger, sexier, and more vibrant. I spent all of last year feeling so old, so terribly old. I want the exact opposite for this year. Most of all, I want to wake up at 2am and make love to my husband in the middle of the night and then go right back to sleep. Now that is something has not happened in what, 14-15 years.
So with 2011 going away, I am saying good-bye to what I hope will always be the oldest year of my life. Oldest not in numbers, but in how I felt as a person. May 2012 bring youth.