Feel like I need to get my mojo back.

I guess it is the surgery and the winter combined. I feel like I am far away from who I was a month ago as far as feeling sexy and womanly. Part of that is because I am always in a bra. I mean always. 24/7. I take it off to shower. Part of that is that I cannot really lay the way I used to in bed and I am covered all of the time due to the cold. I tried on halter tops and they look amazing on, but who can wear a halter top when it is 35. I guess it started prior to the surgery. I wore heels less...the excuse being that I might end up in pain and then not be able to work out. Now in my defense, my foot has shrunk (do not get it either) so a lot of my shoes are too big now and you cannot wear a heel that is too big. I need to get back to being me. Part of that is going to the gym each day. I missed yesterday. I was just exhausted. It was just easier to stay in bed. I find it is so hard to get out of bed when it is dark and cold. The sun does not even come up prior to leaving the gym!!! I know that I am still recovering from surgery and all, but I could have at least gone to walk or something. Then fast forward to today...the person who was supposed to open the gym this am, missed their wake-up call. Got there are 5a. Lights still off. Lights still off at 5:08. Finally people who were waiting at the door went back to their cars. Apparently, the lifeguard of the pool called the person who was supposed to open and got voicemail. He then called another person, but if you are not up at 5am on purpose, who answers their phone? So here I am at home. The garage is too cold for working out there. I did do my ab exercises, though. I just need to get back to being me. I felt good about myself and sexy. I made an effort. These days I make a half effort. My eating habits are in the toilet. I had a little mini Ben & Jerry's ice cream for snack yesterday. That is just not me. I need to get back to clean eating.
As of today we are officially half-way through winter. The ground hog promised an early spring so hopefully he will deliver that this year since the last few years it was definitely a later spring. I long for the sun, the warmth, and the beauty that spring has to offer. I know people hate the yellow wind that passes through in the spring, the breeze covered with pollen. I love it. I think it is beautiful. It is life regenerating.
Not sure what to do up at 5:40am. Got a good hour before I need to really get going. Damn gym...