I am two months and 5 days out

from my breast lift and augmentation. Honestly I am not sure that I will be able to wait. I joined an on-line support group and it only made me want it now. It is not feasible in any language. My son has surgery this week, too much going on the week after, Thanksgiving is the week after that, then our holiday part at work the next week, and then the next two weeks of December will be spend preparing things at work for Christmas, the end of the year, and New Year's long weekend. After the New Year, I have one full week at work which will be a whirlwind and then surgery the next Wed. I am so excited. I find myself wishing time away which saddens me a bit, but in this case, I cannot help it. The good news is that scheduling my surgery has made me really work on my weight. I was down to 138.2 yesterday. (I did not weigh today.) I am hoping to be down to 135 by the end of the month, but my goal is really 132. I decided I want to get to 125 before surgery. I put on a size 6 fitted strapless dress that I bought this summer that was way too tight to wear before. It now fits really well. I look flat chested in it, though, because I cannot wear a bra with it! Too bad that once I get surgery I will not be able to wear it. It will be too small in the top!
Which leads me to my next question. How big do I go? I told both plastic surgeons I saw that I wanted to be proportional and not smaller than a C cup which is what I have been my whole life. One surgeon said he would put no more than 330 cc's. The doc I went with (because he took pictures and really spent over an hour dissecting them with me) said about 400 cc's and that he would move me into a D cup because my breast base is large. I am married now to being a D cup, but do I go a bit bigger? Part of my concern is if I go a bit bigger will it increase the likelihood that I will need another lift sooner? At first I thought I would just be happy with perkier breasts. Now I am not so sure. Am I going insane? Do I really want to have breasts that much larger? Everyone says when in doubt go larger? My hubby wants me to go larger.
The one nice thing about my surgery in January is that I am hoping it will get me through my normal Jan/Feb depression. I HATE those months. They are the worst. I get so depressed. It is cold, dark, and miserable. February is such a short month, but it always seems so long. I am hoping that in continuing my recuperation in those months, I will be less depressed and more excited about how I will look each day and once less clothing are needed.
Anyways, I wanted to thank my husband for fully supporting (emotionally and monetarily, of course) my decision to do this. Words can and never will fully express my appreciation. I never realized how awful my breasts were until this past spring. It made me sad. It is the one thing I cannot change through diet and exercise. It will make me feel a lot better about myself and therefore help make me more confident and probably less self concious about my age.