Now that the decision has been made

I want it here like yesterday. I want to go into surgery today and start looking better now. How funny is that. The nice thing is that it is as if just making the decision to get a lift and implants has changed my life already. I get excited when I think of how I will look in the spring and summer months. I feel more confident already. How funny is that! I am not looking forward to the recovery, but I feel like it is such a short period of time. I got through the first few months of a newborn so I can certainly get through a few weeks of pain and such. The doc is going to make me a little larger which I kind of like. I was always content being a "C" but it will be nice to be a full "D." He says with my height and hips I can carry it. That is one other reason I now do not mind my hips so much. Yes, I used to hate them. I mean hate them. I have wide hips. I am one of those women who when I gain weight I get wider. Some women get round. Not I. I get wider like a pancake in part thanks to my hips. The less I weigh the more thankful I am for them because they will help me keep the shape of a woman which I want. I am really starting to feel my hip bones more and more which I really like. I would like them to be a tad more prominent. Now that I have schedule surgery, I need to lose the last 9-10 pounds and finally get down to 130. I have 10 weeks to do it. It is going to be really hard to lose a pound a week, but I think if I work really hard, I can do it. At least I hope. I want to be as thin as I can for the surgery. The last thing I want to do after surgery is lose weight and then have the same problem I have now. I can live with 139-140 pounds, but I think of how nice 130 would be. Oh, I will gain two pounds from the implants. Each one weighs about a pound so I need to account for that. Maybe 128??? Not sure that I will get there in time!!
I am off today and cleaning. Normally when I face cleaning, I feel good about it. Today I just feel overwhelmed. Maybe it is because the house is a huge mess. Stuff is everywhere. No one (including both my hubby and I) seems to get that we just do not have infinite room for crap. We got to figure something out because this is out of control. My hubby and I are doing better not giving the kids stuff all of the time, but that is more or less because my surgery is going to cost $10,000. Gotta cut somewhere and that seems like a good place since it kills two birds with one stone and keeps us from spoiling the kids further.
It was so funny. My hubby said yesterday that we seem to get the kid who is more like us in personality. I had to point out to him that everyone thinks my son is so sweet and perhaps a bit too sensitive, but so sweet, and everyone knows that my daughter is sweet, but a handful. I always get my son, and my hubby always gets my daughter. I thought it was funny. My hubby is a wonderful man, but sometimes he just loses his emotions over silly things. In all fairness to him, I can get worked up and go on and on about things that irritate me (just like my son!) We both deal with our anger in different ways. Mine carries on much longer. His has more of a bite but if over with faster. Funny how that works. The longer I am married, the more I see how couples end up getting divorced. It is easy to get caught up in the drama and the anger and the fights and let it carry on for days. It gets easier then to not talk about things which makes resentment much stronger. Sometimes when Jon and I are fighting all that I want from him is for him to hug me. It might not make the problem go away, but at least it reconnects us and maybe forces us to talk more rationally about things. Marriage is not easy, but no relationship is. How often does one get irritated with their parents, kids, siblings, etc. You just forgive your kids and parents a lot faster.
TGIF.